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oh hello.. i havent just rambled on here for quite a while now and ive come to hear that some people actually enjoy reading the boring stuff i have to say (god knows why) so i figured that since im bored, maybe id do that. so yeah. lets see.. what have i been up to as of late.. lets recap all the exciting times ive had (or pretend): i got a beautiful bracelet which no one but myself likes.. me and my sister made a huge cookie.. i went to the mall (death).. i made a few trips to newbury comics.. i watched eminem and nsync specials on mtv.. had some bonding time with chrystal.. went to the dollar store and some other fun adventures.. got ditched by a friend.. went to a good show.. didnt meet my ct friend.. worked lots.. took a few showers.. ate a few meals.. slept some.. had some disturbing conversations.. had some funny ones.. made TWO adventures to ct.. almost witnessed megans death.. took some funny (hopefully) pictures.. saw monica's sister's new baby (awww!!).. heard an hour long monica story.. saw that movie loser (there were 4 people in the theater.. yay?).. tried calling trapper for heather.. watched that lame (but oh so addicting) fact or fiction show with megan last night and i got ALL of the stories right. im so smart! yay .. got talked into staying an extra night in western mass (always happens.. im so damn loved. ha.).. dyed my hair (the color i use is called "gothic".. how cool am i??).. had a few psychic experiences.. slept till 11:00 one day (yikes!).. watched something called "porn to rock" on vh1.. went looking for new sneakers (sigh..).. got some sour bright crawlers from my sister.. did lots of driving.. lots.. witnessed my sister trying to also fit her friend in her pants with her (successfully).. hmmm.. what else have i done.. i dunno.. i dont lead a very exciting life.. but thats fine. i am done for now. alright how wonderful.. email me.. i like mail.. not getting any makes me sad : ( ha ok goodbye.
so i wrote that this morning.. rereading it makes me realize how drastically my mood can change in a matter of hours.. at this point in time i cant even imagine being the person that wrote that.. just being all seemingly happy and what not.. i dont even think i could smile right now if i tried .. it is so confusing.. i dont get it.. why cant i always be happy like that.. sigh.. i need to go. this is making me even sadder.